THIS..is our new SEGi T-Shirt. Friday is declared as our T-Shirt day, in line with our recent Transformation initiative and to promote unity & synergy among colleagues.

Trying out the tee for the first time last night, I asked my lil boy, "Nice or not, this T-Shirt?".

In his usual very-expressive-self, he answered in excitement, "Wooww.... so youngggg hor..the T-Shirt".. his eyes lit up.

Where on earth did he learn that, now?

3rd aunt

phone call from home always shivers me. especially during my working days...

mom called me at work, and i hear worries in her voice. she's at the hospital pumping more blood into her body. she told me 3rd aunt is also in the hospital. she is hospitalised, since yesterday. mom said 3rd aunt is conscious but she doesn't recognise them anymore.

she is in her 60s. and she has been up and well, and helping here and there all her life. i remember her as a loving aunt, who took care of my grandma, grandpa, and all the children in the family. she took care of my brother too. and she has never sighed.

i met her during my Miri trip this year's chinese new year. she has full grown of white hair, but she looked great.

i will not pray for her not to die, but i will pray for her to not suffer..

i love her and i will miss her.

Anniversary the 6th..

Exactly a year off from blogging. aiyer...busy with this, that. i have forgotten even to tweet.

But we must not forget LOVE despite our drowning into the hectic society..
It's my wedding anniversary tomorrow. Six wonderful years of ups and downs.

Sixth anniversary holds the theme CANDY/SWEETS.

I ordered a customised chocolate from Singapore and made them to sticks.. and tada.. this is what i made for my hubby:

mind, soul and body...

since my last entry, i have been really occupied. mind, soul and body.. eh sounds like an ad..

no, i mean it. i wasn't feeling myself after the first encounter of vestibular. most of the evenings after i return from work, i felt very tired. certain times of the days, i felt like the world is shaking, or otherwise i felt giddiness. then certain nights i was unable to sleep, and then on other nights, i was having a row of terrible nightmares.

phew... physically and mentally very unstable.

on the domestic side, my boy has eloped into another stage of mischievousness - the level which truly backfired my patience. it also tore off hubby's thin temper. really feel exhausted. and when these 2 gentlemen screamed at the same time, i wish my vestibular would attack :)

work has been alrite, the normal busy, but office politicking is also wearing me out emotionally. i've always treated colleagues as friends, but it seems otherwise. in the real working society, it is always cruel and selfish. nevermind that...

then there is this half of my mind always with my mom. worried about her health status, her cancer treatments, and tremendously heart-broken when she told me of her effects. i felt extremely useless and hatred for myself that there was nothing i can do to ease her pain. i can only pray hard.

then of course, financially as usual, but over the years, i guess i'm used to my fateful life, haha..

above all, i still maintain a positive disposition. truthfully, it isnt' because i am a strong person. it's because i love the people around me. i know that if i live happy, they will too. i am trying hard up to this very day. despite all the worries, i smile in hope that it will make the day brighter for all those around me.

vestibular what?

weeks ago, there is this one night when i experienced my world spinning... no, it wasn't my hubby. my world was literally spinning, haha..

i already felt a bit giddy when i was grocery shopping at Giant, but i thought it was just my normal anemic thingy. later that night at home, i was in the washroom when i felt like the seat was going to tumble down. i ran out to my hubby and asked him, "Did you feel it? Is it the earth-quake again???" Then when i realised what i was asking, we both had a great laugh.

hubby insisted i go to bed early. i must be feeling too exhausted he said. so i checked on my kid in his cot. that was then i really felt dizzy. i quickly lay down on the bed. the non-moving ceiling fan was spinning non-stop. it's like someone is pulling your scene and pasting it back again and again. and when i couldn't stand it i closed my eyes, i felt nauseas. i went to vomit...

went to see the doc. doc said i have vestibular disorder. in layman's term, it's the imbalance of the liquid in the ear. he said i have fever and should be infection which led to this. i do not know what the hell he was saying.

he wanted me to take MC for 2 days and my eyeballs almost fell out. 2 dayssss!!! then he told me i must rest otherwise it will get worsen. my eyes were still widely opened in shock, and he calmed down a bit saying he will give me 2 days MC and i sort it out myself. it is because my doctor knows my boss too :)

deepa-raya celebration..

it has been a long silence.. too occupied with work, family and all..

mom's hp got stolen again.. i was very distressed but i didn't sound to mom. she couldn't help it. after the treatments she'd take some sleeping pills, and the shitty person stole it OUT of her closed drawer. burn in hell! burn in hell! burn in hell!!!

from mom's voice, i can tell that she's getting very tired from all the treatments. i'm visiting her tomorrow.

then work has been pretty busy. and i try not to glue myself to the laptop after work all the time. more personal touch and quality time for the family, i told myself..

one fun thing to remember is our office poolside Deepa-Raya celebration on the 9th October. i didn't know what to wear. i took out my mil's sarong, and my modern kebaya-like top. but ended up wearing a saree, thanks to an Indian colleague. She is a very nice lady, and mind you, her Mandarin is so much better than me. I really had a great time dressing up. Many colleagues lent me their unique belongings to "accessorise" me..haha.. and it was really fun.

when i came home that night, hubby opened the door and shockingly said, "Ai Si arr..".. and my boy was staring at me as if daddy brought his mistress home..kakakakak.....

using me..

it was a rather heart-breakening week at work. i cannot imagine a colleague would have used me to fish information for her own benefits. she literally dug info from our casual friendly conversation to please her boss, to impress her boss. i was quite disappointed. upset!

the only option i have now is to stay away from her. it's saddening but in this real working environment, this is the way they play the game.

it isn't like i haven't known her. in fact, i've known her for years. i've witnessed all her true colours, how she dumped the dead cat onto other's bowls, how she claimed credits for the work others did, and mostly backstabbing indirectly. man, she is so good...

but i have always accepted every individual fairly. we all have plus and flaws, i reminded myself, including me. i've always gladly mixed around with her, despite her unpopularity amongst colleagues. but this is truly the last straw...

blame no one - you asked for it!